"Young men tend to come into relationships feeling very strong and powerful, and they make a lot of mistakes. But they soften when they have daughters. You see women through a whole different light, because now you know that they were once someone's little girl. I wish I'd had this knowledge when I was 20. I wish I could call all the women I've ever dated and apologize. I didn't know how precious they were. I know better now."
– Oscar nominee Terrence Howard spoke to RedBook about how having two daughters has changed the way he views his previous relationships now.
The 40-year-old actor voices the character of the father in Disney's upcoming movie, 'The Princess and the Frog.'
*****
For other stories, read also: 'Frankly Speaking: How Oprah Inspired Mo'Nique'
& 'Frankly Speaking: Whitney Houston Has A Habit.'
Mel B Pictures
In this photo provided by Kraft Foods, Spice Girl "Mel B" poses for a photo wearing a T-shirt she designed based on the classic pink ribbon used for breast cancer awareness, after a fashion show and launch of "Pose for the Cure" web site to help Kraft Foods raise money for the 'Susan G. Komen for the Cure' fight against breast cancer in New York, Tuesday, Sept. 23, 2008. The shirt is for sale on the web site and the net proceeds will benefit the foundation. (AP Photo/Kraft Foods, Ray Stubblebine) **NO SALES**
AP
In this photo provided by Kraft Foods, Spice Girl "Mel B" poses for a photo wearing a T-shirt she designed based on the classic pink ribbon used for breast cancer awareness, after a fashion show and launch of "Pose for the Cure" web site to help Kraft Foods raise money for the 'Susan G. Komen for the Cure' fight against breast cancer in New York, Tuesday, Sept. 23, 2008. The shirt is for sale on the web site and the net proceeds will benefit the foundation. (AP Photo/Kraft Foods, Ray Stubblebine) **NO SALES**
AP
In this undated image released by Oxfam Tuesday Sept. 23, 2008, British singer Mel B participates in the 'In My Name' global campaign calling for action against poverty and demanding world leaders keep their promises on millennium development goals. (AP Photo/Oxfam, HO) ** NO SALES **
AP
In this photo provided by Kraft Foods, Spice Girl Mel B, left, serves as the emcee at a fashion show and launch of "Pose for the Cure" web site to help Kraft Foods raise money for the 'Susan G. Komen for the Cure' fight against breast cancer in New York, Tuesday, Sept. 23, 2008. Mel B wears a T-shirt she designed based on the classic pink ribbon used for breast cancer awareness. The shirt is for sale on the web site and the net proceeds will benefit the foundation. The woman at right is unidentified. (AP Photo/Kraft Foods, Ray Stubblebine) **NO SALES**
AP
NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 09: TV personality and designer Khloe Kardashian and Olympic-level swimmer and model Amanda Beard (R) pose backstage at the Mel B With Ultimo Spring 2009 fashion show during Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week at the Metropolitan Pavilion on September 9, 2008 in New York City. (Photo by Astrid Stawiarz/Getty Images )
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NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 09: Ultimo Scottish designer lingerie brand founder Michelle Mone (L) and pop singer Melanie Brown pose backstage at the Mel B With Ultimo Spring 2009 fashion show during Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week at the Metropolitan Pavilion on September 9, 2008 in New York City. (Photo by Astrid Stawiarz/Getty Images )
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NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 09: Pop singer Melanie Brown poses backstage at the Mel B With Ultimo Spring 2009 fashion show during Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week at the Metropolitan Pavilion on September 9, 2008 in New York City. (Photo by Astrid Stawiarz/Getty Images )
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NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 09: Pop singer Melanie Brown and Olympic-level swimmer and model Amanda Beard (R) pose backstage at the Mel B With Ultimo Spring 2009 fashion show during Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week at the Metropolitan Pavilion on September 9, 2008 in New York City. (Photo by Astrid Stawiarz/Getty Images )
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NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 09: Pop singer Melanie Brown and singer Aubrey O'Day (R) poses backstage at the Mel B With Ultimo Spring 2009 fashion show during Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week at the Metropolitan Pavilion on September 9, 2008 in New York City. (Photo by Astrid Stawiarz/Getty Images )
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NEW YORK - SEPTEMBER 09: Pop singer Melanie Brown, Olympic-level swimmer and model Amanda Beard, singer Aubrey O'Day and TV personality and designer Khloe Kardashian pose backstage at the Mel B With Ultimo Spring 2009 fashion show during Mercedes-Benz Fashion Week at the Metropolitan Pavilion on September 9, 2008 in New York City. (Photo by Astrid Stawiarz/Getty Images )
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Comments: (57)
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By: PJD120 on 11/18/2009 2:14PM
I applaud Terrence for saying what he said. Most african american men wouldn't say what he said. But usually men that have daughters see this because now they have someone they have to protect from the wrongs men do to women. Now I'm not saying women are always right, because that is not the truth. But for the most part, it is the women that are always somewhere with their heart broken for what a man has done to them, and that goes for all the nationalities, not just african american men. Again, I applaud you Terrence.
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By: dre on 11/24/2009 1:37PM
i hope u black sayin alla datt...im young and i all i realize is that dem "little girls" act like hoes now days, so in truth there is NO good girls to be nice too! i had my heart broken also, so i hear what he's saying but at the same time, thats not an option for guys who dated "tricks". sorry T.
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By: monique on 11/24/2009 2:39PM
I know alot of black women who also need to get to apologizing. This ain't no one way street!
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By: Sheryl on 11/19/2009 8:18AM
While I think he is on the right track, he needs to apologize to his ex-wife for hitting her. All the world comes down on Chris Brown but Terrence, along with SEVERAL other are members of the same tribe: "Slap-a-woman" and they still go on as if nothing ever happened.
Terrence, Tyrese (he pushed his wife down while she was pregnant), Warren Moon, Barry Bonds...the list goes on.
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By: kfree on 11/20/2009 1:19PM
Your comment is one-sided & I'm pretty positive that you don't know all the facts of any of the alleged altercations you mentioned. Black women ACT as if they're queens and pillars of community and that they're the epitome of grace & joy - especially if/when their IMAGE is challenged. Please, we all - us Brothers - know better, that things are different behind closed doors. Black women often-times display their emotions physically, be it positive or negative. The same way black women never admit PUBLICALLY that they may have physically provoked an altercation, black men will never apologize PUBLICALLY for his involvement if he felt duly justified. There is a ridiculous double-standard but the bottom-line is that no man will stand for an unreasonable amount of verbal or physical abuse without reciprocating - try remembering that. First-hand knowledge.
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By: Joshua on 11/24/2009 9:05AM
Wow.You guys sound like the republicans against the Obama administration.Terrance cannot win from losing.The man came out on his own and sent love to his exes who could have very well fell into the category of "Golddigger" but he did not go there.He simply showed loved and respect for his past and of course a "Black Woman" tears him down and you want us to believe he is wrong.You have proved the point of other comments by your negative statements to a black man trying to show love.But I'm sure like the rest of society and the legal system, you are simply waiting your turn to throw stones.....RIGHT!
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By: Correction on 12/02/2009 2:01PM
I am replying to kfree: Mr. Howard did not have a black wife... I know someone who when to high school with her..., so... what is that about black women... oh, so general??? Your comment is one-sided & I'm pretty positive that you don't know all the facts of any of the alleged altercations you mentioned. Black women ACT as if they're queens and pillars of community and that they're the epitome of grace & joy - especially if/when their IMAGE is challenged. Please, we all - us Brothers - know better, that things are different behind closed doors. Black women often-times display their emotions physically, be it positive or negative. The same way black women never admit PUBLICALLY that they may have physically provoked an altercation, black men will never apologize PUBLICALLY for his involvement if he felt duly justified. There is a ridiculous double-standard but the bottom-line is that no man will stand for an unreasonable amount of verbal or physical abuse without reciprocating - try remembering that. First-hand knowledge.
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By: Sally G on 11/28/2009 11:42AM
I assume "ex-girlfriends" include "ex-wives", no?
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By: Greta on 11/21/2009 4:21PM
It takes two sides, and we don't know what went on in any of those cases behind closed doors. It is not right to hit a woman, or a man-but it happens. I come from a long line violent divorces, etc and I've seen it work both ways, and with all colors, creeds etc. If someone says "I'm sorry" in any form, you can accept it, or move on. If they are sorry, they will "live" to do better and show that over time. If not, they will distroy themselves, with no help from anyone else. In many cases, not all, Black women, and men are not taugt grace, poise, polish. We are taught and forced to survive, however we can. And sadly, progrmmed to tear each other apart. As such, we can not make general statments; not all black men bully black women, not all black men reach success and marry white women. Not ALL black woman are crude, and loud, etc.
As to Terrence, he's has been on his own since he was 16. I don't think anyone can make him say something that he does not mean. If he says he's sorry, most likely, he is.
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By: Hugh on 11/29/2009 6:21PM
Hold on a minute, what do you mean reach success and marry white women? So a black man isn't worthy of a white woman unless he's successful? Is marrying a black woman settling? I'm not trying to be an instigator here, but that little subliminal remark didn't get past me;it pissed me off. I agree with everything else you said, but I think what you mean was "not all men bully women". I think we should stop mentioning race in these stories. All that matters is a man had an epiphany, and is apologizing for the wrongs he did, and I applaud him for that. Again, not instigatin'.
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